Catherine Tyson-Sewall, a late-life love advocate and author, found love at 50 with a man 25 years her junior after raising three children alone. She passionately shares her journey and strategies for finding love later in life, inspiring others to stay hopeful. As a single mother, Catherine turned her experiences into heartfelt books, including “I’m Somebody’s Mama” and “Single Mama, Powerful Not Pitiful.” Her story encourages people to believe in love at any age, showing that perseverance and positivity can lead to unexpected joy.
Can you share the pivotal moment or realization that inspired you to begin your journey in advocating for late-life love and empowerment?
Probably a few years in, when I realized that I had actually found a love that was true and something to even talk about. Sometimes with ladies, we get excited too fast, and before the dust settles, the cracks start to appear, so I, like most people, just stayed still, until it was obvious that this love was real, it was good, and it was here to stay.
How did your experiences as a single mother shape your perspective on relationships and finding love later in life?
As a single mother, I had things to do, so whenever “love” showed up and it didn’t feel right, I just let it go because there were 3 other people involved who deserved to see and be a part of good and positive relationships with people claiming to be in love. If that didn’t come, I didn’t want it. Obviously, with this outlook, there was no other choice but to wait until it came or try and try again if it was not manifesting itself. Finding love later in life was more of a default situation rather than a plan. In other words, it just happened that way.
In your books “I’m Somebody’s Mama” and “Single Mama, Powerful, Not Pitiful,” what key messages do you hope readers take away regarding resilience and self-discovery?
To take care of their children and themselves and not focus on what other people need to be doing for you or with you. To continue to build yourself, be full as you are, and not expect someone to fill you. To realize that your power is within and not from any external sources. To get that right first, and then, by default, you’re preparing yourself for someone to compliment that if it happens. And if it doesn’t, you’re still good!
What advice do you have for individuals who may feel discouraged about their prospects of finding love as they get older?
I would say to stop focusing on the external and “finding” something. To value you and what you have, the people, the things, the accomplishments, the connections. Be happy and bask in the glow of your life as it is, and work on yourself to be the best you that you can be. And when you’re not looking or when you least expect it, you might just stumble upon something just as wonderful as you are. It was when I wasn’t looking that I found love. A happy, contented person attracts more than a sad, miserable one, so begin with you and start to appreciate yourself and your life.
Could you describe the emotions and challenges you faced when you decided to embark on a new relationship at the age of 50?
Well, since 50 has been the new 40 for some time now, I didn’t really think about it. These days, women are looking fabulous, so we are not even aware that we are that “old.” Plus, my dating life has never been an issue, and if there was an issue, it would have to be the slim pickings for a “good man,” because it is tough in the dating market.
What strategies or mindset shifts did you adopt to maintain hope and positivity during your journey to finding love later in life?
I never lost hope. I talked to God. I got clear on what I wanted and, more importantly, what I didn’t want. I continued to pay attention to what didn’t feel right in my spirit and became more in tune with those gut feelings. And I started to love being in my own and not being afraid of being alone if he was not the right one.
How did your family and friends react to your relationship with someone significantly younger, and how did you navigate any potential societal judgments?
My family and friends only questioned the authenticity in the beginning, but because I’m a pretty solid person, they ultimately trusted my judgment. My husband is also such a genuine person that he won them over very quickly. I also got accepted by his mom (who has passed on), and his dad very early on, which made things much easier. Society was and is a whole different story because it’s the opposite of what has been accepted, being that the man is the significantly younger one in the relationship. Sometimes I felt judged. That was very tough for me. Luckily, I still look younger than my age, and he looks mature for his age, so to look at us, if you don’t know the age difference, we don’t look odd. But that was challenging in the beginning for me. I must say, on the other hand, that my husband has never made me feel anything other than young and gorgeous and that he is proud of his woman.
What role did journaling play in your personal growth and self-reflection, particularly as you transitioned into a new chapter of your life?
It was an avenue to get my feelings out and be able to normalize or process them. Journaling, for me, is a conversation that you have with yourself and the universe. It’s private. No one’s opinions matter, and you’re not interrupted. It’s very therapeutic, like having a good cry or prayer and then getting up feeling refreshed. It’s a great way to get things in perspective and to start your day.
As an advocate for late-life love, what misconceptions would you like to dispel about age and relationships?
I’m an advocate for life, as long as we are blessed with it. I think that as long as you’re alive, you should live your life to the fullest and not let anyone put you on a shelf. As we get older, our value should be non-negotiable, and we should stand on that. We have lived long enough and worked hard enough to have that right. It is so funny that inside you feel like you always have. There is no age until you start thinking about it, or see the wrinkles, or feel the aches. Age is a number, but we put the value on it. Ironically My husband is older than I am in many ways. I think that’s why we work so well because he is an old soul and I’m still very young at heart. I love to dance and have fun. He’s a homebody and is quite intense. But together, we balance each other out, which is awesome.
What are your top tips for individuals who desire to embrace love and new beginnings later in life, based on your own experiences?
Live, travel, and explore.
Life is to be lived to the fullest.
Laugh often.
Find joy in your life.
Join a travel club.
Embrace your good friends and put them on your calendar.
Love your family. Dote on your children and grandchildren, and find other things to do with yourself.
Get off the shelf. Don’t “old” up yourself! You’re not dead until you’re dead; so live! Because if not now, then when?
Be’n Original
