My fiancee and I have been together for four years. He wants to marry me but the question is when. My parents want me to dump him and move on. Should I force a timeline on us getting married?
Dear Put A Ring On It,
I’d say you are doing better than most… He did in fact put a ring on it. In case no one has ever told you, men are quite complicated and not nearly as simple as they claim to be. One of the things I teach at my Demystifying Men event is how men develop and when they become ready for marriage.
If he has not yet settled on a date for marriage, it’s probably because he is trying to get his financial life to a place where HE feels it needs to be in order to take care of his family. You are thinking about setting a wedding date and he is thinking about making enough money to put the kids through college.
Give him time and space. Don’t pressure him. Ultimatums never work out well and their effects are short-lived. Mute the noise, tune everyone out and continue to be the partner he sees in you.
Rachel Davis is a renowned relationship expert. Selected questions will always be published anonymously and the advice will always be real. Send your relationship question along with your age and a short description of the issue to: LoveByRachelDavis@gmail.com.
Disclaimer: The advice offered in this column is intended for informational purposes only. Use of this column not intended to replace or substitute for any psychological, financial, medical, legal, or other professional advice. If you have specific concerns or a situation in which you require professional, psychological or medical help, you should consult directly with an appropriately trained and qualified specialist. The opinions or views expressed in this column are not intended to treat or diagnose; nor are they meant to replace the treatment and care that you may be receiving from a licensed professional, physician or mental health professional. This column, its author, the newspaper and publisher are not responsible for the outcome or results of following any advice in any given situation. You, and only you, are completely responsible for your actions. “
